The Jaffa's New Clothes
by Tittamiire
Summary: Skydiver's Christmas present. Daniel takes Teal'c shopping to kit him out for his new life on earth. Early Season one No pairings Only warning: Silliness


Sam grabbed two beers from her fridge and passed one to Colonel O'Neill, who was leaning against her kitchen counter. She popped the cap and leant back against the kitchen island, feeling a little awkward. 

"Why am I here again?"

She gave him a look, "Daniel and Teal'c are on their way over. They've been out to get Teal'c 'kitted out' for his new life on earth." She gestured for the words kitted out and noticed that the Colonel followed the movement of her hand like a dog watching a fly.

"Why are they coming here?"

"Daniel wants our opinions." She paused for a moment and considered something. "He actually sounded a little worried on the phone."

"What could be so hard about clothes? It's not like people are going to think Teal'c is odd because of what he _wears." _The Colonel waved his beer bottle to emphasise his point and foam spilled over the top onto his hand.

Sam was about to say something about maybe it Daniel who needed the reassurance more when they heard a car pull up into her driveway. Sam gave up on what she had been about to say and went to open the door for Daniel and Teal'c. Daniel was already stood in the doorway when she opened it and he stumbled into the hallway, accompanied by several large bags and looking a little shell-shocked.

"So, how'd it go?" asked the Colonel from the kitchen doorway, waving his bottle to encompass all the events of the day into 'it' and causing his beer to froth again. "Damnit," he muttered as Daniel glanced at him and then looked at Sam, looking imploringly at her.

"Sam, you gotta talk to him," he asked almost plaintively.

She felt a little taken aback, talk to who? And about what? Daniel must have noticed her puzzled expression. He dropped the bags and put his hand to his forehead.

"Teal'c. You've got to talk to Teal'c"

"About?"

"Um." He thought a moment and called out of the doorway. "Teal'c? Are you coming in?"

"Momentarily Daniel Jackson."

"Well. You see," Daniel started to explain. Then Teal'c appeared in the doorway, hands calmly behind his back and suddenly Daniel didn't need to explain. Sam was surprised by what he was wearing and she couldn't help the surprise playing across her face. She looked back at Daniel and saw that he still had that plaintive look on his face. She felt the surprise subside a little as she looked Teal'c up and down and gave a lopsided half-shrug.

"I think it suits him."

"But it's a kilt," Daniel's voice was close to whining now.

"A kilt is almost a skirt," contributed the Colonel helpfully from the kitchen doorway.

"I find this particular garment most comfortable. The sales assistant imparted some of its history to me and I find it appropriate." Teal'c explained and walked between Daniel and Sam to go into the kitchen.

"He's right," Sam told Daniel a little apologetically.

"But he's trying to fit in. He won't fit in wearing a kilt."

"He's a giant alien! A) He isn't going to fit in regardless of what he wears and 2) no one is going to comment on his clothing because he looks like he could tie them in a granny knot." Colonel O'Neill had been forced to move from the kitchen doorway to allow Teal'c past and his attention followed Teal'c's path into the room even as he held up the fingers he'd used to count out his points.

"Don't worry Daniel. This is Colorado Springs, first time he gets an icy blast up there he'll reconsider." Sam patted him on the shoulder, "come get some coffee." She turned him towards the kitchen.

"Don't Jaffa wear a lot of skirts anyway? Robes and those armour things?" The Colonel gestured to his hips to demonstrate which bit of the Jaffa's armour he was referring to as he followed them into the kitchen. Teal'c had poured himself a cup of coffee and he reached for another mug for Daniel. "Indeed," was all he said to Colonel O'Neill's comments about skirts and armour, clearly Teal'c felt no need to defend the Jaffa's collective masculinity.

Daniel accepted his coffee and sat down at Sam's kitchen island.

"Besides, aren't robes just like dresses if a kilt is like a skirt?" Sam suggested, referring to Daniel's time on Abydos.

Daniel accepted the coffee and drank from it slowly, very slowly, as if avoiding answering. When he did finally put the coffee down he avoided both Sam and the Colonel's attention.

"Yes, but _I_ wore underwear. Teal'c has gone _really_ traditional with his kilt."

They all fell silent. It was taking all Sam's willpower not to look at Teal'c and in particular Teal'c's waist area. Colonel O'Neill took a long drink from his beer and still the silence dragged on. He took another long drink and then finally broke the silence.

"So, how 'bout them Bronco's?"


End file.
